Life

         Spring break comes to an end....It came and went without stopping to say hello. When I was in high school, I desperately wanted to be in college. I was ready to move out of my parent's house and to start my life. I thought, "life will be more fun in college". And life is fun, I got to George Fox and met tons of amazing people, who for some reason, wanted to be friends with me too. I have been blessed by the people that I have met and become friends with. But college also brought heartache and seasons of sadness; something that I didn't make room for when I was moving in to my Macy 1 room in September 2010. I was just excited about meeting this Maddi Mularski who I was about to spend a year living with (and had no idea we would be roommates for the next three years).  Life is harder than I had anticipated, though. High school had it's own set of challenges, but looking back, I can't imagine why I thought it was so hard and why I was so ready to move on. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't go back. But, in the grand scheme of things, high school is easy. College is more difficult. I remember my mom saying something, to that effect, to me one afternoon. Becoming a responsible adult is harder than I was aware it would be. And, while I do not want to be in college longer than I have to be, what's next? Life is only going to get more busy and chaotic. Hard times are constantly going to be around the corner. And, honestly, I am afraid. Not terrified, per say, but afraid. My life isn't going to be this easy graduate - get married - have kids - retire - life. I had always imagined that my life would follow my parent's pattern, so-to-speak. But at that rate, I should be pregnant right now and that's definitely not an option for multiple reasons, one of which is that I am afraid of that too. As someone who knows that God is in control and that there is a plan, why is fear such a prominent part of my life right now? Is it because graduation is one year away and I have no idea what I am going to do with my life? I would bet that is part of it. College is hard, but I have a hunch that this in only a taste of what life is going to throw at me. Insurance, mortgage/rent, cell phone bill, water bill, heating bill, LOANS, the list goes on. I am gonna have to deal with all that. Talk about overwhelming. College is just a stepping stone to get to post-college life. But, sheesh, can I just camp out here for a few years...except, I am ready to be done with school. I just need a pause button. I have always been a "future-looker", but when I get to married-children life, will I be looking to retirement? I hope not. I hope that I can learn the art of being content. Fear is hard to let go of, but I do know that God is holding my hand. So, maybe it's my humanity and sinfulness that still wants to fear the unknown, when I fully understand I am being loved and cared for. I just am asking for peace of mind that I am where I am supposed to be and that my future will glorify God and that I will be content and happy. The only way to look is up.


Philippians 4: 6,7
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus (NKJV)

God's Love

The roaring of the ocean plays its tune softly in the background. The black birds make their song. The blue sky leaves the heavens open for the sun to warm the earth. How amazing it is to be alive every day; to breathe the sweet air that surrounds this globe. Our world is full of hurt and pain, but surrounding that is the love, beauty and compassion of the human race. Praise be to God for loving his people, to put them through hard times and to them hug them with love.  He sends his angels down to protect, while the sinful world slowly kills itself. Even though we are lost in sin, we are blessed and loved and surrounded by beauty that is unfathomably great. Who are we to deserve this? And how is it that we can be saved by Jesus Christ? Bow down and worship Him, for he has us in the palm of his hands and he watches us as we make poor decision after poor decision. And yet, He loves us every moment in time. Sin takes us off of our path and many never return to the path. With every hurting, searching human being that never makes it back, God weeps for their hearts. His hurt shakes the earth. And yet, we blame him for the cruelty of Sin. Mankind suffers hurt and the whole time God is calling out our names with open arms, begging us to embrace Him. We don’t want to admit that He is the solution to our death, so we destroy ourselves. People! God is good! He wants us to allow him in our hearts so, He can save us each and every day from the sin that surrounds our race. Praise Him, for sending the birds to sing, the oceans to roar, and the flowers to paint the earth. 

Relationship with God in Solitude

      There are times when you are given the freedom to just sit. Often times it is not necessarily something that you want to do, because of things that need to get done or other things that seem more inviting. Take into consideration, however, how often you allow yourself the time to let your mind wander or even allow it to mindlessly notice the shapes of the clouds or the sound of the wind in the trees. I find that I can sit and listen or watch people go about their days for hours and leave those moments feeling less stressed, more content, happier…you name it.
Human beings often times get so caught up in our lives that we don’t give our bodies time to rejuvenate. I’m not talking a good 8 hours of sleep or a twenty-minute afternoon nap every so often. While that is good, I feel that we were created to spend time in thought. It is hard for me to write things I am passionate about without bringing in my religious beliefs and how that correlates. I feel, personally, that your view of religion and of God can have such an important role when taking our lives into consideration. All that to say that I feel obligated to add another point about “quiet time”, which, in turn, illuminates what I believe.

This time that we, as humans, crave seems to be quite persistent. I firmly believe that God created us with the need for that time, because we need that time to worship him. He calls us to worship him and when placed in a serene place with no one else, our mind becomes relaxed and cleansed, simply because we are not distracted by life. Either that, or we have a place to consider the distractions of life and how to, then, deal with them.
If any of that makes sense, then I am incandescently overjoyed. But, to sum it up, I feel like human beings need that time of sitting and pondering because we were created to need that. Primarily, we need that to focus on God but he gives us that time to simply relax and clean out our minds. That’s the only way I can explain why everyone at one time or another, or on multiple occasions takes time to get away, even if they are not believers. We, as human beings, are programmed to need that time to just sit and be. 

Loveology from Solid Rock

A friend of mine showed me this link and when I watched these three sections, I was blown away with the great things that this man had to say. Consider the main points. They are incredible.

Solid Rock Church
http://www.ajesuschurch.org/topic?id=627&c=1939

This is not mine. Just so you all know :)

Valentines Day

Deep in slumber, she slept on the morn of Valentines Day. Sure, it was Valentines Day and yes; she had a sweet boyfriend who was planning something. But she stayed curled up in bed and dreamt.

“Wake up”, chimed her roommate around 8:30am. Rubbing her eyes, she wondered why her roommate was awakening her. As her eyes were focusing, she noticed the smell of pancakes. In the arms of her roommate was a platter full of her favorite things. Tears filled her eyes. A deep red rose lay next to the orange juice attempting to capture all of her attention. She did not fail to notice, however, that this platter was full of all of her favorite breakfast treats; there were pancakes with peanut butter, scrambled eggs with caramelized onions and orange juice with lots of pulp. What a way to wake up! Every girl who walked by her door peeked in to see what all of the hubbub had been about and squealed upon hearing the special treat her boyfriend had surprised her with. She stuffed herself and then prepared to go trudge through the rest of Valentines Day with a smile on her face.

She told her boyfriend that her breakfast was yummy and thanked him, but he stopped her and told her that there was more to come. What more could a girl ask for?

After her classes she wandered back to her dorm and worked on her homework. She knew she would be going somewhere for dinner, but where? Around 5, he walked in and said, “let’s go”. His voice is her favorite sound ever. She melted at the sight of him and couldn’t get ready fast enough! What was he planning! Where were they going? They got in the car and drove off. She loves being in his car. It’s the best place to be. She feels a warm feeling of safeness when she is with him; that she can trust him with anything.

As they pull up, she found out that they were going to a Thai restaurant! He had gone far and beyond what she had expected. She could have hugged him all night, she was so happy. They ate. The food melted in her mouth. Every bite was even more delicious than the previous one. She thanked him for breakfast and dinner with a hug, unstoppable smile on her face. He only smiled and said, “there’s more”. How could there be more? She was being treated like a princess.  It was all too much! They hopped in the car and drove off. Finally she figured out that they were headed to a spot to overlook the city; a place they had been a few times before. She smiled and held his hand the whole way there.

They drove up to their spot and sat and looked over the city. It wasn’t too foggy, so they were able to see most of the lights. They flickered and sparkled. He hopped out of the car and she began to wonder. The trunk opened and shut. He crawled back into the car carrying a box of chocolates and a rose. More! She was in over her head. Her face hurt from smiling. He explained that he had tried to dye the rose black because black was her favorite color, but it had failed. It was, however, a beautiful white rose with dark spots. Unique. Special. She loved it.

She loved the day, she loved the food, she loved the drives that took them to their destinations and she could have sworn she loved him. He was a special guy who treated her with compassion and kindness. She was blessed beyond words and happier than she had ever been. 

A healthy relationship

So, I was thinking the other day about relationships. Personally I have only been in one. But, through that and observing my friends date I have come up with an idea of a really good, healthy relationship. Instead of writing out a huge paper, i am going to list the things that I have in mind.
1. First and foremost, a relationship should benefit one's spiritual life; help you grow as a believer.
2. I believe a relationship should go sooooo slooooow..... meaning that, the first step should be becoming really close friends. you do NOT need the physical part of a relationship one week into it. And this time frame of getting to know each other may be different for different couples, but really. What is the hurry? My relationship went way too fast for me and it really put me in a slump and scared the crap out of my parents. A relationship is built on the idea of getting to know one another, not being physical.
3. Keep your friends in mind at all times. One of the worst things you can do to your friends is make them feel awkward. If you and your significant other are always holding hands or cuddling when you are together, something is wrong. Your hormones are ruling the relationship. And it is no fun being the friends that have to sit there and watch. I have been both the girlfriend and the friend that had to watch. NOT FUN either way. Your friends just want to keep having awesome adventures with you, not sit around and watch movies so you and your girlfriend/boyfriend can cuddle.
4. Be a part of each other's family. Get to know the parents and siblings. It helps you get to know your significant other even better. In my last relationship, my boyfriend did not want me to get to know his family or get to know mine. I have no idea why, but it made me really sad. Being a part of my boyfriend's family would be really cool. In addition to that, let's just say that you end up getting married. You do not want to have to get to know the family after you are engaged and have to be forced to like one another. It is just not a healthy situation.

And 5. last but not least, Keep your bodies pure. that is all I am going to say.

Those are the top 5 important things in a relationship, that I believe should be kept in mind when entering, revisiting or just fixing a relationship. 

Growing up

It's an odd thing...getting older. leaving childish toys and literature to be a part of your past. It's an odd thing to think that once you could be entertained with dolls and toy cars. Now, while maturing, you find yourself being entertained by going to the movies with friends, playing sports and your days are filled with school. 
Work that was once the abc's is now the Illiad. Your thoughts are deeper and your actions have more resposibility behind them then they used to. An apology can't always clean the damage you have inflicted on the people you are close to anymore or as simply as it had in your young past. Your innocent, meaningless crushes have a different reality to them now. 
Responsibility is the main thing you must have as you mature into an adult. the change that takes place is quick. surprisingly quick. It seems that one moment you are 13 and the next you are 18, entering your adult life. Responsibity. How does that look? is that different than the responsibility that your parents taught you to have with your puppy or your dirty laundry? In a lot of ways, yes. But in some ways no. It's the idea of responsibility that has not changed. that will never change, no matter your age. But the ways in which we must be responsible. that is what changes. Our school work. How drastically different is our 3rd grade homework versus our college mid terms. Our study habits have become our own. We no longer need our parents to make us do our homework. we do it on our own. Our friendships. responsibility. we are responsible now to treat our friends well. not because if we dont our parents or teachers will force us to make amends. But because we understand the blessing of a friend. we understand that, as God's people, we are to treat people we know with kindness and love. 
Our relationships have changed with boys. Those boys who we used to play with during recess are now some of our best friends. And resposibility comes with how we like a guy. How do we begin a relationship with a guy? Responsibility. We must understand why and how we are to date as a follower of Christ. In seventh grade, the only thing that mattered was if the guy you liked smiled at you or flirted with you. 
Growing up changes everything. It changes your view on life. The blessing that God has given you. Those people who are in your life have a purpose. You realize this as you grow older. You begin to understand that friends are not just there to have play dates with but to help you when times are hard or to celebrate when times are good. To pray for and with. To be there for. To learn from. To teach. Growing up is an exciting thing.
As I grow up, i feel these changes. I notice that everything that i have been given is a blessing. I thank God for my life and those in it. There are times, though, that i am afraid. Can I be an adult? Am I a strong enough person to deal with the struggles of adulthood? But, then I am reminded that I am not growing up on my own. Not only do I have these friends and family around me, protecting me, but I have My creator watching out for me. And when I begin to tremble with thoughts of my future, of growing up and leaving my young self behind, God stills me like he stills the storm. He has my life planned out and it is my job to trust him. I have been blessed to grow up. And I and prepared to continue to grow up, even when i am scared.